damn

been mia for 2 months.

college is crazy

gained like 5 pounds

all the work in the summer was for nothing

kinda depressed

but not really

i LOVE college.

maybe ill come updat this from time to time.

but prolly not.

bye.

got high && binged yesturday. =/

still working on my abs.

no wieght lost

but i wont give up

i have sooo much to do this week. doc appointments, work, shopping, defensive driving, spending time w/ friends, boyfriend anddd family. all this before i leave next sunday.  im sooo excited. its getting kinda surreal now. like i always wanted this moment to come and now that it has...its kinda overwhelming and scary.

but im really looking forward to it. =]

plans

its a little after midnight where i am.

here is the plan for when i wake up:

- 30 min ab workout
- 30 min walking [hopefully] if i find my gym card
- breakfast: eggs whites, little snack right ham turkey chunks, grapes
- snack- tuna && crackers
- lunch- salad w/ snack right ham chunks [might add something else here to..idk]
- snack- grapes [this might change too]
- dinner- healthy choice

hmm dnt rly have anything to do today. i was gonna go shopping with a freind and then get my belly button pierced buutttt she has to take her sister to get surgery. sooo oh well.

[UPDATE]
- 25 min on tredmil= 151 calories out
- 20 min strength workout w/ wieghts
- afterworkout snack= banana
[i hate them but my brother says they are good for your muscles after you workout]

&& now im watching americas next top model. [motivation] =]

[UPDATE 2]

so you know that feeling in your stomach...the one when you havent eatin in a while and its growling and you can reallllllllllly feel it?

thats how my stomach has been for the past ten minutes. i was just about to go eat something. but now i dont want to. b/c i know that that feeling means that my body is lasting off of the fat and excess cals i have in me already. which meanssss that im slowly losing. =] its wierd. im not starving or anything. im hungry but i could go a while without eating.

is it wierd to like that feeling?

[UPDATE 3]

yayyyyyyyy im so proud of myself right now!! =] i walked allllllllllllll day. i still dont have my car so i was walking around the nieghborhood all day. to my friends house,home,her house again, home, the park, home

its crazy. im hot. and i gotta tan.

im also proud because i went to her house and her and her sisters were eating burgers. they asked if i wanted one i said NO!! =] iinstead i stuck to my plan and had tune and crackers =]

bout to leave for work. im gonna do my abs when i get home at 11:30pm.

i feel great =]

whats goin on with yall?

im weak.

yes its true. im weak. but im working hard sooo soon ill be strong. mentally && physically.

i must admit that the last couple of days i planed to fast. BUT life is a bitch. shit happens. and things change. i ended up fasting only half the day both times then eating crap for the rest.

soooo ive decided trying to fast isnt working for me.

i have two weeks till i leave and these will [without a doubt] be the best two weeks ever.
socially, healthy wise, work wise && everything inbetween.

sorry i havent been on and commenting/messaging.

that changes now.

b- grapes
s- tuna & crackers
l- brown rice, broccili, italian mild sausage.
s-tba
d- tba
water/tea- 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8
workout:
[x] 30 minute ab workout
[] 30 minute ab workout
[] 10 minute streatching

mmm that sausage was really good. had 20 grams of protien and no sugars or anything. healthiest meal ive had in a loooong time.

tomorrow im going to the gym in the morning to walk/light jog on the tredmil for a little.

fully focused =]

ugh

broke the fast with a hot pocket and skittles. =/

starting over.

i got a new workout dvd. sooo im excited to try. tomorrow= all fruit and & liquids w/ a healthy choice for dinner.

next week im going on a hard core liquid and fruit fast. anyone wanna join?